I think they are very selfless and such a wonderful thing for a person to do for another person.
Having adopted a child I can relate to the feelings of not getting pregnant (yea, until I adopted, that is!), and this is one of the loveliest (wrong word!) thing a woman can do for another person regardless of the reason.
A lot of Good has come....and some sadness has come for these mothers.
My concern first is 1st for the Surrogate.
Not for the couple wanting a child, because there still is adoption.
As far as the child, (well the child has not yet been born) so I put that one...... to the side.
I understand the gift of life, and in some cases, I think it could be o.k....but! I still feel the Surrogate mother has yet to experience, the gift of giving the child she has carried for 9 months.
The loss of the child, even if (really not) hers.
The feelings she will have in the years to come.
It is not just about being a selfless person, she can not fully understand her own 'feelings', until she has given up the child.
Only in cases of extreme would I feel it could be used, where the S/Mother has had a family of her own, and she no longer wishes to expand her own family.
That she is a person who is giving maybe because the couple could not adopt, and the woman to be given the child, would benefit greatly from this gift.
I have always thought it is a very bad plan for the 'most', and should be used in exceptional cases.
Only because of the S/Mother, theirs is a ' Absolute Journey '. It seems quite one sided, and the S/Mother may say she is fine with it....but having had 5 pregnancies I fully understand being a woman carrying a child.
It is not that simple, no matter 'how' strong a woman says she can do it.
No one else in in her head, and she will in time have thoughts, of what she has done...and it is
a very lonely road to travel, for her.
Done in the right situation, for the right reasons and for no monetary gain. . .it can be a truly selfless gift. As to the morality of it, well, I can't judge but it seems sad for some women to have ten children and some have none. Some people don't want children and that is fine but it must be an awful thing to want a child and not be able to conceive or carry to full term :(
I think surrogate mothers are. Wonderful people in helping others who can't have children. However, I cant help shake my head in trying to find a motivation. With surrogacy being illegal in Australia, couples are often forced to seek surrogates from overseas, where the motivation often being financial gain. Surrogates have massive physical change thrust upon them, which could potentially be fatal. Pregnancy, even in an otherwise healthy woman, can lead to disease such as gestational diabetes, and pre- eclampsia to name a few. These are enormous risks to place upon yourself voluntarily. I know that they are rewarded handsomely for their trouble, but pregnancy upsets your life so much, that I couldn't do it for a stranger. Some women make a career out of it, and have several surrogate children. It is not just the desire to help others and be selfless. I would be happy to do it for a sister, but not a complete stranger. The bodily changes and mental and emotional changes would.be hard. I dont know whether I could be trusted to hand the baby over, as I would grow attached to it. Going through labour for someone else would be hard. It is difficult and painful to do it for yourself, let alone someone else.
This topic is not a simple one. At uni, I studied the economy in which surrogacy currently occurs and I came away even more convinced of it's complexity. As an idea, it's appears admirable. But once the intricacies of the process - political, physical, legal, ethical, moral, even religious - are considered, it becomes a minefield.
I am well aware of my bias, having been able to carry and birth two children of my own, but I believe there is a reason some people can have children and others cannot - regardless of whether or not we understand these or however unfair it may seem.
For those who tout that women in the developing world are given a chance to provide for their families by carrying another person's child, any economy that reduces a woman to the sum of her parts is not sustainable and the rights of those women cannot always be guaranteed - not to mention the rights of the reborn child, in this case.
I do not like the idea of surrogacy, but I have to admire the women who "choose" to be surrogates because of the enormous risk and sacrifice they take on.
I actually think that there are situations when this is a gloriously selfless and generous gesture on the part of the surrogate, I do not however like at all, the idea of a woman being paid any amount of money to do such a thing as carry a child for profit! I could go on at great length on this subject, but shall leave it at this for now.
It's up to them what they want to do with their own bodies. However, I think surrogacy is very problematic since women can be exploited, as in the cases where rich couples pay a poor women in an poorer country to be their surrogate. There's so much pressure that could be put on them to agree to it when their family needs the money so badly, and I hate to see women's bodies commodified like that. And then there's the messy cases, like where surrogates are asked to "reduce" the number of babies (abort one of twins) or abort a child with a disability and don't want to.
In the case of altruistic surrogacy, where for example, a woman is carrying a baby for her sister who can't do so herself, I think that is very generous, but it's also possible she may be coerced into it, emotionally rather than financially. There's a danger of seeing women as incubators rather than people, and I don't believe that the desire to have your own biological children overrides all other considerations.
I don't like the idea of being a paid surrogate mother as it commercialises something so special. However, I also think surrogate mothers are admirable for helping others to have children, as long as they don't have any problem with this. I've heard of stories where surrogate mothers don't want to part with their babies in the end and things get messy for all parties involved.