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Have you ever actually hated anyone, and why?

by Finy (follow)
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Have you ever hated another person?


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I have hated a few people in my life -the last ones I remember are my partner of 18 years and my very best girlfriend who was like my sister -they went off together, and I really hated them for a long time and in particular her -she broke my trust worse than he did as he did not treat me well anyway.

I no longer hate either as I don't care about either.

There have been a few others down the line that I have hated, but I do not hang on to this feeling as it only damages self.
by Finy
My Mum (bless her) always taught us not to hate. So I always used to say " intensely dislike". And if you're not around the person that much, it is easy to move on.
However, there is one woman I have had the displeasure of working with for the past 18 years who I have grown to hate (yes - I said it!) She is the most manipulative horrible &$@%# I have worked with. Split personality, nasty, always lying & manipulating the unwary to get her own way & do as little work as possible. She once told my husband I had a boyfriend (not true of course), put up jokes on the back door of every ladies toilet cubicle making fun of the way Kiwis speak ( I'm the only Kiwi in the office & yes I can take a joke), opened my pay slip & tried to make out it was an accident, has done other things in the office to make sure I'm not included in group things, speaks officiously to people, has a general superiority complex thinking that she is the most important person in the office & everything should revolve around her etc etc etc. I could go on & on. Every time I try to be nice for the sake of working in a more pleasant atmosphere she ends up trying to take advantage of your good nature. I take small pleasure in knowing that these traits also go into her personal life & the blokes cotton on to her ways & don't stick around as at the age of nearly 50, she's still single. Always has been & probably always will be as she's so selfish.

Other people have done the wrong thing by me however I don't hate them - I may be disappointed & saddened more than anything but now I find I can just move on.

Well, that's my little rant & rave for the evening hahahaha. Time to chill! (-:
Is changing jobs not an option for you -it must be SO unpleasant
by Finy
Wouldn't give her the satisfaction Finy. It's a good job with good pay & great benefits which is why I stay. Many others know what she's like so I'm not alone. I'm no walkover so she doesn't always get her own way. I've survived this long & it won't be forever. It does put my stress levels up though. (-:
Oh, Therese, that's so sad. What a pathetic P.O.S. she is. I just mentally stabbed her for you. *cue music from Psycho shower scene* Muwahahahaha. Hope you feel better now ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ
by Rice
Oh Rice Paper, I love your reply and you just had me laughing out loud. I must have answered that question about a year ago & guess what - nothing has changed with her in the way we interact with each other. I'm dealing with another situation with her at the moment where I just want to punch her one (which of course I wouldn't ). Thank you for giving me a giggle this evening as the whole situation has been getting me down. 😀😺
Heehee . . . . might have missed my calling as a hit woman . . . . ?? (00)
by Rice
There are many people I have disliked. Many more I have misunderstood (or who have misunderstood me). But I choose not to hate. It's too distructive and totally unnecessary.
Yes! I was extremely damaged by one particular person,and honestly,I would rather not recall it as it has taken so long for me to get over it! Hate is such a very strong word,and I believe that most of us use it indiscriminately.I have intensely disliked MANY people,usually due to their intolerance of various other people or groups. And I really do not have time for mean people,whether they are mean in spirit or in behaviour! Since I became ill,I have made an even bigger point to not allow negativity into my life.I find I have very genuine friends and there is no-one at all I personally hate any more.I got over that other one a long time ago as it was too detrimental to my own well-being to continue this dreadful feeling!
One person stands out in my mind. He used to like to take advantage of people. He was very charismatic and good at what he did. I was around long enough to see his routine in action twice. He would befriend one person in a group of friends, ingrain himself usually in the group within a few weeks, start taking advantage of certain people in the group (live on their couch or eat all their food, whatever he needed at the time). Then so people wouldn't notice him taking more and more, he would choose someone in the group to paint as a bad guy. He would alienate that person, start backstabbing them, and so on. Because people were focused on the conflict, they didn't notice that he just kept taking. He would just move on to another group as soon as people started to notice, sometimes stealing things before he left, sometimes not. That was fifteen years ago and thinking about how many friendships he ruined still makes my blood boil.
There have been loads of people I've hated, but I can't remember most of them now. The one that does stick out in my mind, however, was one of my therapists, who acted very superior, repeated everything over and over again, as if I were thick, very lecturing, and made my entire life worse than it was before I met her.

I find it quite easy to hate someone. Generally anyone who is rude, badly behaved, or consistently gets on my nerves fits into that category. I also automatically hate homophobes, racists, and sexists.
How sad that you find it so easy to hate! Are you sure this is not intense dislike?
by Jules
It can be difficult to distinguish between the two.
I have disliked quite a few people.....it is a frustrating feeling that they can't see what they are like.........however, find it hard to actually hate someone...reiterating what a few people have said, I believe it only damages the self...better to move on, living an amazing life of peace, tolerance, and empathy for ones fellow man (oh my god sooo noble yello!!)
by Fran
LOL yello
by Finy
I don't think there is anyone I have truly hated.
by AJ
Hate is such a strong word! I don't think I have ever really hated anyone, but I certainly have disliked someone IMMENSELY! People who call themselves friends and then backstab people in a friendship group, people who have no regard for the feelings of others, those who are arrogant or rude and people without empathy. - all high on my list of "immensely disliked"!
Happily no never hated anyone... Dislike plenty though :)

Hate is an extremely strong emotion. I don't think I ever hated anyone before about September 2013. Now I can say truthfully that I hate both Tony Abbott and Joe Hockey but, when I think about it, I think I can say that I'd hate anyone who supported this budget. Yes, truthfully.
Yes Tony abbot sprang to my mind as well. He has a face you just want to slap !
by Aliso
I agree with Aliso - My hand sometimes just itches to slap Tony Abbott in his smug face! I am not too fond of Joe Hockey either - "poor people don't drive" what an asshole!
by norma
Wahahahahaha. So many of us would like to slap Tony Abbott! Though I must confess I always thought Rudd had a face for slapping too ;-)
by Rice
there have been times that I have actually hated other people, maInly rude, aggressive drivers who's impatient, speedy driving, actually puts others lives at risk, they are the people that I fantasise about using a taser on !

Dislike intensely, but never hate.Just not in my nature.
Strong dislike but not hate.
by Gia
Not hate actually - waste of emotion, but I certainly have disliked quite a few people over the years. Have to say mainly politicians who have such an air of entitlement, and have no concept of how the average person deals with day to day life.
I probably do hate all those *unprintable* people who abuse children and animals but I just detour around people I dislike, move on, forget them. As others have said, the negative vibes are self harming. I guess it comes from being a pushover :((
by Rice
Intensely disliked my mother in law. This reached a point 15 years' before she died, I stopped talking to her.
She was THE cause of many problems.
I do believe she was mentally retarded. There're things that have happened, which point to that being true.
I 'curse' her whenever appropriate. It lets off steam.
No, I feel that hating/grudges is like a cancer.It will eat away at a person until nothing is left. I have disliked people, but, to hate someone, no. That's not in my character.
Yes,I hate my father's family. they are pieces of nasty work, they wanted to take over my mum and dad's finances,just because dad had dementia, ignoring us as his off spring and my mum is with her wit's, then they wanted to plan dad's funeral behind our back, but it backfired!
I'm speechless. I know this is an old question but I really hope you have been able to push these control freaks out of your lives and get some peace. Your poor mother, being treated as if she doesn't exist :((
by Rice
I actually hate(d) my father's family, they never gave any respect to the marriage of my father and my mother! my father used to do errands for them a lot, he would take them to appointments even though they had their own cars, unfortunately dad couldn't see that he was being used , just because they were his family, then when dad started to get dementia, they never bothered about him, when we had to go to the guardian ship board they thought that they could just take over, and that we would have no say in the matter including my mum, what a shock! we found out that they went behind our backs and put themselves down as dad's next of kin, they tried to put him in a nursing home of their choice,they even put down how dad didn't have a will and that he would be burried in a government funeral, surprise! dad did have a will and I am the executor of the will! and the guardianship saw all this obviously we were chosen as dad's carers and the nail in the coffin was when they wanted to take over the finances, wrong again! mum was appointed the administrator to take care of the finances. Finally when dad passed away we had a nice private funeral, and his family didn't even know dad's birthday passed and they didn't bother to go to see him, otherwise they would of known he had passed, one week later my mum let my uncle know, to tell his sister. they were rotten to the core!
Bravo you!!! Serves them bleepedy bleep right.
by Rice
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