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What questions to ask yourself before getting married?

by Pauline (follow)
Relationships (204)      Marriage (63)     


Questions to ask before getting married, marriage tips
Exchanging the rings

Wedding or marriage is a happy thing but it is also just the beginning of a life long journey and long-term commitment. The reality is that there are many things to consider as well as topics to discuss between the couple. What are some of the topics you will ask (or have asked) your partner?

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Whether or not we should really have kids? Honeymoon? If the relevant couple decides to have a child, what religion should that child be? This is just the tip of the iceberg.
Whether or not we should really have kids? Honeymoon? If the relevant couple decides to have a child, what religion should that child be? This is just the tip of the iceberg.
Do you really want to spend years and years with this person.
Do you know that it will change over time.
Are you willing to share with this person.
Are you willing to be honest no matter what.
Are you willing to never cheat, and know you can only have that person.
Are you willing to compromise at times...even when you don't really want too.
For interfaith marriage, it's important to ask - How to raise up the kid? based on which religion/faith?
Sorry about submitting the answer twice - it wasn't intentional. My Internet played up for a second, as soon as I submitted my answer. Sorry about that ):
Great question and very important:
-Can you see yourself growing old with this person?
-Are you happy to sleep with just this person for the rest of your life?
- will you love your spouse through the good times and the bad?
- in sickness and in health?
- do you trust your partner with your heart and with your life?
- are you willing to love them forever no matter what?
- do you agree on where to live, whether to have kids etc?
- do you have similar morals and goals for the future?
- who will do chores, shopping and housework?
- do you have similar ideas when it comes to financial maters?
Frozen - the kids movie, has a song that lists some of the questions you should ask the person you're going to marry (or at least things you should know the answer to - the point being , you should know them very well before making that commitment)
Is it necessary to get married? (Read 'Committed' by Elizabeth Gilbert). Does a wedding band guarantee fidelity?
No it doesn't, but marriage is not simply about 'fidelity'.
by Vee
A lot of people say you know you've found the right person if you "can't live without them" but I think this is the wrong question to ask because it is typically based on an emotional feeling. Marriage is a lot more than a bubbly feeling you get when you're around someone. It's about financial problems, grief, crappy nappies, difficult family members and disputes, disasters, and the deepest depths. The fact is that people don't leave relationships that are all rosy, but no relationship is rosy all of the way, so I'd ask one simple question "could I live with and tolerate this person for the rest of my life in all circumstances if I had no way of ever escaping them?" You wouldn't be thinking of marriage id the bubbly stuff wasn't already there, so if you answer "yes" to this question, I'd say you're ready to marry and it's more likely to last than if you answered "no".
by kimp
I have married the wrong man, divorced then married the right man.
I wished I had asked myself (before the first marriage). Why don't we agree more? Why do we argue? Do we do anything together? He gets drunk sometimes...I don't drink...will that be a problem? He goes to church to accompany me (I later found out, not because he wanted to go for himself). Get the picture?
I was married at 20 so probably wouldn't have listened to warnings. Now I'm married to my second kind husband. We truly are soul mates and best friends with the same outlook on virtually everything.
Many good questions have already been suggested so I wont repeat those. I think some people get married because they love the romance of the engagement ring and the wedding day. Ask yourself if it is a wedding or a marriage that you want. You should know that at times you may fall out of love with your husband, are you both committed enough to see the rough times through to the other side where your love is stronger for the trial. Does your partner have strength of character and good morals. If you have ever seen your partner cheat or deceive someone else, ask yourself if you are prepared to have that happen to you, because it will.
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