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How much is a reasonable amount to spend on a Kitchen Tea gift?

by Vee (follow)
Friends (64)      Wedding (27)      Gift (20)      Present (12)      Kitchen Tea (1)     

Kitchen Tea
Image by Melodi2, sourced from morgueFile.com

Weddings can cost an arm and a leg for both the couple and their guests. Throw in the Kitchen Tea, the Henís and the Buckís and youíre looking at a hefty sum.

How much do you think is a reasonable amount to spend on a gift for a friendís Kitchen Tea celebration?

#Kitchen Tea
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I'm not really up on the etiquette. I thought you just bought the one present for a couple who were getting married. Are you supposed to spend money on all of those things? That seems excessive and a bit tacky. Er... $50ish for a wedding present maybe? Depends on your finances, and how close a friend you are I suppose.
Perhaps it's a cultural thing, but yes, if we are invited to each of those things then we chip in. And we don't give presents for weddings, perhaps I should've said that. We give money.
by Vee
I think kitchen teas used to be a thing here, but may have died out people have usually been living on their own or living together as a couple for a while before they get married instead of moving out of their parents' home for the first time, so they already have most of the stuff they need and aren't setting up a new home. I could be wrong about this. I don't know. I didn't have a kitchen tea.
The question is:''How good are you hunting down bargains''?
It is o.k. to ask her what she would like, and you don't want to buy something she will have plenty of.
Ask in what area does she need something....normally it is for the kitchen.
You would be most surprised to find that K-Mart often have amazing things, and dirt cheap.Then you can give 2 or 3 gifts.
I came across things marked down 70% & 80% & even 95%!
Other store are good, but you have to put the work in...Well worth the effort too.Make sure it is really wrapped up very nice, that's also the key.
Keep your eyes open...open...open.
Also go on line, and have a good old scout around.
This is fantastic advice jonaj, if only she didn't have a gift registry or expensive taste. :| You should've seen the bargains I got for the one I had earlier this year. You would've been proud of me. :)
by Vee
Oh! wow.
I have to say that those gift registry's are a pain.I went to one once, and I felt faint, at what she had picked.
Expensive stuff, so I said ''well we won't be having any of that nonsense''.
I spent $30 on a lovely cake stand, somewhere else....lol.
That was that.
by jonaja
lol jonaj, good for you sticking to your principles. I'll let you know how I go. Perhaps Myer will have a sale!
by Vee
Just keep your eyes open, you will find something...let me know :)
by jonaja
So I found a frying pan and a dinner set she had on the registry, but it was on sale, so am quite pleased with myself. :)
by Vee
So I found a frying pan and a dinner set she had on the registry, but it was on sale, so am quite pleased with myself. :)
by Vee
''Go you good thing''!!!! LOL :) brilliant spot.
by jonaja
I've never even heard of a Kitchen Tea! It just sounds like greediness to me.

The tradition here in England was to have wedding presents that were supposed to help the newly married couple set up house, no other presents were required. However nowadays an awful lot of people getting married are older and already have a fully equipped house. I know when I got married we had both had our own house so had at least two of everything and we told people NOT to give us anything as we had no room for any more! Instead we set up a charity and asked for donations to that if people felt they had to give something. Personally, when other folks get married, I think about their circumstances and consider what would do the most good and I will be straight with them. I will offer to make a donation to charity if I think they really don't need any more material goods but if they are young or in financially straitened circumstances then I will ask what would be helpful for them. I would not be buying presents for multiple parties though. That's just taking the mick! If you have expensive tastes then you cannot expect others to pay for them on your behalf. I would think twice about attending an event if it was made clear to me that I had to buy an expensive gift to be considered welcome. Or I would contact lots of other guests and get everyone to put a small amount into the pot and get one gift between all of us.
VerityG, I think that Kitchen Teas don't have to be about greed. In our culture it is almost unheard of people living together prior to marriage, and so for me it's a nice idea to help the couple set up their first home together. I do however agree, that you cannot expect people to pay for expensive gifts, especially when you also expect them to give money at the wedding.
by Vee
I am so out of touch with this sort of thing, that I almost did not answer this one.

I would not spend more than about $20 assuming you are shortly going to the wedding where you will spend about $100 - $200.

It is ridiculous to have to spend more on a kitchen tea.

I actually think it is a cheek of anyone to have this when they make lists of what they want for wedding presents.

What is the point/idea behind it? Apart from presents....
by Finy
Like I said to VerityG, Finy. I don't mind so much if the couple is not living together and will only move into a house of their own after the wedding. In our culture is is rare the couple will live together before, so it's more of a helping hand than anything else. I just think people should be mindful of the things they put on their lists as guests may not be able to afford such expensive things and end up feeling embarrassed or inadequate because of that.
by Vee
I totally agree Vee, some things are way too expensive on those lists.
I think it is also very rude to ask for items, that expensive.
by jonaja
'Double dipping'?

I didn't have one, don't agree with them.
Would be same invitees' as Wedding, so that's financially amoral, IMO.
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