Normally, I feel guilty for not attending. I've become quite the hermit over the past few years, mostly because I don't have the money to go out. I miss being able to be out and about, whenever my wife and I do go out now, it's an occasion to be cherished.
I think sometimes it is guilt about not turning up or me thinking they want me to feel guilty. However I am getting much better about doing what I want and the guilt is a lot less than it used to be... and yes, sometimes I don't want to spend the money or the petrol to have an OK time. Also I think people who love to socialise just don't get that some days you don't want to see anyone.
I probably would have gone if I thought I would have a good time, so it wouldn't bother me. If they were trying to make me feel bad about it I would be annoyed, but more at the fact they were trying to make me feel bad than because I missed out.
I feel annoyed as usually I never intended to go in the first place. My amateur orchestra's dinner is on a Saturday night in November, at a golf club a bit up the highway.
I get up at 7am Sundays for another commitment, and will have had the previous two Saturday nights out, the one before this event, being our concert.
I also don't drive so am relying on someone to want to leave early to take me home at evening events, otherwise I'm stuck.
The committee president spoke to me at the rehearsal she handed out these notices, and that's when I told her the above information is part of my decision to not go. I didn't go last year to this same party, at a different venue, and the world didn't end.