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Do you judge or empathise with people?

by Sasha (follow)
People (26)      Emotion (8)      Judgement (3)     

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Do you judge people or give them a chance in your life by empathising with them? Do you believe we are all a package of good and bad when you empathise? Or do you put yourself in a spot where you would say "if it was me I would not do something like this" and simply judge someone for their actions?

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Top Answers
Depends on the person. Sometimes I do both. Sometimes neither.
I judge sometimes and then I feel guilty of doing that. I empathise too, but that's necessary, isn't it?
I do both. I think most people have judgements about others, but it's how you use your judgements (for good or bad) that I believe make the difference. I will definitely try to empathise, but sometimes unless you have literally walked in that person's shoes, you can still be a mile off. I make judgements regularly but I also try to learn about another person's perspective, giving the benefit of the doubt where possible. I think you're allowed to say, if it was me I would not do something like this', as that is your own perspective albeit there is likely not much gained from sharing an 'if it were me' statement. I'd not wish to put someone down for doing it there own way.
I think when you judge another, it says more about you than it does about them.
If we are totally secure in who we are, what we believe in and how we live our lives , I believe that we don't need to elevate ourselves at the expense of another.
Shelley, I appreciate your point, but I don't think judging others is necessarily about elevating ourselves. I think it is important to be able to critically look at others and ourselves, not for the purpose of approving or condemning but for the purpose of improving ourselves and learning from others' mistakes, as well as our own.
by Vee
Both. Going to university showed me just how judgmental I can be. I am embarrassed to say this, but at least I have learned from it, I would judge people's academic ability by their appearance. My goodness, I will never do that again! I try to empathise with others, but when our morals and viewpoints are diametrically opposed, I find empathising with them very difficult. Instead, I settle on respecting our differences.
by Vee
I have been a bit judgemental lately but luckily I realised it with the help my best friends and loved ones. Thanks to all of them for helping me come out of this. Empathy automatically happens when you one stops judging.
I think I do both.

However most of the time I would emphasize with friends as I think that is far kinder to them than judging them.

I would not say something like "if it were me" as having done a bit of physcology I think that is an accusatory type of comment and very judgmental.

If i would not like it done to me, I would not purposely do it to someone else.
by Finy
I do both but I am an empathetic person generally. I might frustrate some people because I tend to be a fence sitter...I can usually see both sides of an argument. If I see someone behaving badly, I wonder at how they came to be damaged and antisocial and wonder if they were shown love might they be different.
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