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Did you live with your partner before marriage?

by Vee (follow)
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bride and groom
Attribution: s349142, morguefile.com


Research conducted in the UK found that couples who lived together before they were married had higher rates of divorce than those who did not live together before tying the knot.

Are you married? If so, did you live with you significant other before you were married?

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Nope - we didn't (our virginity was our wedding present to each other), and we're still deliriously happy after 21 years. You don't have to look far to find the research showing higher divorce rates among cohabiting couples. There is also other research showing a correlation between number of sexual partners prior to marriage and divorce rates. It should be easy enough to find - it's been around for decades and it's one of the reasons we decided not to cohabit before the wedding night.
by kimp
I totally disagree with this parks
by Finy
LOL, then we disagree too Finy. I'm with Parks on this one.
by Vee
Yes I did. So far, so good on the divorce front (it's been nearly 11 years). Do you have a source link for that research?
Sorry Jennifer, I was listening to a segment on the radio. However, here are a few links that I found (sorry, I haven't read them - trying unsuccessfully to hold a conversation and read my emails. Some of the links suggest that age is a major factor in martial success as well.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/15/opinion/sunday/the-downside-of-cohabiting-before-marriage.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/03/the-science-of-cohabitation-a-step-toward-marriage-not-a-rebellion/284512/
http://time.com/20386/how-shacking-up-before-marriage-affects-a-relationships-success/
https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/study-confirms-cohabitation-leads-to-higher-chance-of-divorce-and-lower-rel
file:///Users/stevenbuljubasic/Downloads/LivingtogetherStatisticalRisk.pdf

I suppose like all things, one can't generalise. There will always be exceptions to 'the rule' and individual circumstances and factors come into play.

by Vee
Ok, didn't realise that last one was a PDF, so it might not work if you copy and paste it into your address bar. Maybe just Google the title.
by Vee
Thanks Vee.
No worries. :)
by Vee
I'm not married :-D
LOL, then you needn't worry. ;)
by Vee
We did live together before marriage but only for about 11 months and only once we were engaged AND a wedding venue had been booked and paid for! I had been very badly hurt in a previous relationship where my partner had just walked away scot free because we weren't married, so this time round I needed significant reassurances that marriage was on the agenda before I would commit and move in.
I live with my partner and we aren't married yet

The first time NO as it was not done many years ago!

The second time YES, as by then it didnt matter.

The third time yes as we never got married -he did not think we needed a certificate to stay together.

As I mentioned in a previous post, we did not stay together!
He is the one who went off with my "very best friend".
by Finy
Yes.
Definitely NOT!
Neither of us believed in that.

In the long run, 41 years', it gives us something of which to be very proud.
It's a good bit of 'oneupmanship' on those who didn't!
That was OUR beliefs, but every person is different. You've got to be able to live with your conscience.
We didn't live together before we married. We've been happily married for 47 years, 2 months, 1 week & 2 days. as I write this! I met my husband on the 21st of a month, & married on the 21st of another month, 5 years later.
.
Yes for a few years...
No I didn't. But if I had wanted to, I would never have been game. I think my mother would have "come between us"……probably physically.
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